Goodbye 2008

Dear Mister God,

Now that the winter solstice is over and the days are beginning to lighten up, one tiny minute a day, I feel it's time for some reflection. Thanks for my safe passage all this time and please forgive my sins, my Lord Mister God.

I have now lived in the UK for 1 year 3 months and it befuddles me how fast (and sometimes furious) time has passed. I did not see the credit crunch coming and certainly not how it would have any affect on me. The atmosphere is starkly different from last year’s. Shops are plastered with "Closing Down Sale" posters and new office buildings left unfinished and vacant. My daily bus rides through St Paul’s and Liverpool Street, that used to fill me with such awe and wonder, have now become somewhat a journey of remorse as this is no longer the hurly burly London I’ve just gotten used to.

Before all this talk of doom and gloom, I was back in Singapore to visit friends in March and there I found Jesus. Religion is a funny thing and having faith in something (in this case someone) you cannot see, is a whole new experience altogether. For lack of a better way of saying this, Jesus is like a “no limit, no expiry date” coupon that bails me out each time I screw up.

I’ve also discovered that good things in England happen in the countryside. Since Singapore, I've spent Spring in Dorset at my aunt’s cottage where we picked wild garlic and nettle (which stung me!) along some fairytale-like foot path and fed farm animals. Who can say they got stung by their supper, or document the birth of a baby Alpaca, right? Farming, gardening and cooking your own produce has also earned a place on my “100 Things to Do Before I Die” list. The world may be crashing but at least you know you have enough pumpkins and apples to last the year. I've also met the lady who makes Madonna's (or rather Guy Ritchie’s) gamekeepers’ breeches. What a great country trivia, huh?

I now live in East London, home of Jack the Ripper and the cockney accent. Ain’t it? I share a flat with a same age (same birth month too), single female. And we have spent many nights contemplating the bountifulness of foods but the somewhat lacking of male companionship in our lives. I find it excessively funny when we start discussing romantic comedies in detail.

On weekends, I comb the East London street markets and take photos of foods and flowers as a desperate means of tempting friends to visit (hint hint). I have also become very good at sniffing out a bargain. Nutella, £0.99, Costcutters. 3-for-1 Wholemeal rolls, £1, Sainsbury. 2-for-1 paté, £1.10, Budgens. I’ve also learnt how to cook (better). I have fed several English people Laksa, Chicken Ginseng Soup, Curry Chicken and already my Otah Toasties have a fan-base in East London. *cough*

In summer, I spent five weeks in Edinburgh, Scotland, helping my cousin’s company run venues at the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. There I met an array of colourful characters from drag queens to has-beens in the theatre industry. Everyone became fast friends and for many, the experience would change their lives forever. For me, I'll never pronounce "Thirty Third" quite the same again when I can say "Dirty Turd" instead. Thank you for Scottish accent.

Since the Fringe Festival, I have been working in my cousin's London office, answering phone calls, putting up Course Details for acting classes and my proudest work moment was the day we had our first photo shoot session. It’s a little taste of home (for me) and for now the closest I will get to photography styling again. We call these photography sessions “Headshots” and I look forward to the day Daniel Craig swaggers into our studio for his portrait taken by us. One can really dream!

My future is uncertain, as with everyone’s, and on that note, dang the credit crunch. I’m going to embrace the New Year with hope, love, peace and lots of commercial success. I hope the same for my friends and family too. I pray, in Jesus' name. Amen.


Lots and lots and lots and lots of love!
Kittycad
xx

Genesis 24:50-51

Laban and Bethuel answered, "This is from the LORD; we can say nothing to you one way or the other. Here is Rebekah; take her and go, and let her become the wife of your master's son, as the LORD has directed."

Abraham sent his chief servant in search of a bride for Issac. Off he went, obediently, to another land with gifts and camels in search for this bride. Firstly, the servant listened very carefully to his master's instructions. He also regarded his task as a high privilege, an honor, and not an inconvenience. He was devoted and faithful that God will bless his journey and goal. When the servant found a maiden who was kind to him, God made it clear to him that she was the one he has come for. And when the maiden agreed to follow him back to marry Issac, the servant generously gave all the gifts and camels to her family.

---

Dear Mr God,

This is a somewhat simple yet powerful story. Thank you Mr God for helping me understand what it means and how it relates to our Christian life and purpose.

This servant is a reflection of what we as children of God should be; people who would go to the ends of the world and bring more people to you, like the servant in search for a bride for Issac. And like him, we should listen to your instructions and be generous to others with all the gifts that you have given us. And last but not least, we should be upfront and unashamed of who we are and be willing to speak freely about you.

Mr God, I pray that you will tame us into good servants who aren't afraid to serve and honor you and most importantly, to trust in you in delivering us to where you want us to be.

Thank you Mr God and please deliver me too.

Love,
Kittycad

‘All That I Have Is Yours’

Luke 15:31
31... ‘Son, you are always with me, and all that I have is yours.

After running a few errands for his parents, a little boy went to his father and said, “I know why you and mummy had me.” “Why?” asked his father. “So that you guys would have someone to run errands for you!” exclaimed the boy.

Like the little boy, do you see God as a Father who demands obedience and service from you? Have you ever felt that unless you obey Him and keep all His commandments, you don’t have a right to be blessed by Him?

Jesus shared the story of the prodigal son to show how some of us call God “Father” and yet don’t know His heart. There are two sons in this parable. We know what happened to the prodigal son, but we can also learn something about the older son. This is what he said to his father when he discovered that his father had thrown a party to celebrate the return of his irresponsible, spendthrift brother: “Lo, these many years I have been serving you; I never transgressed your commandment at any time; and yet you never gave me a young goat, that I might make merry with my friends.” (Luke 15:29)

Now, this son believed that his father had brought him into the world to serve him. He saw his father as someone issuing commandments to him all the time. And he saw himself as someone who had to obey those commandments to enjoy his inheritance. But the truth is that the father had already given him his inheritance. (Luke 15:12) The father even reminded him lovingly: “Son… all that I have is yours.” And I am sure that that inheritance included more than one goat!

Have you, like the older son, failed to understand your Father’s heart? Your heavenly Father already gave you a rich inheritance in Christ when you became His son. He wants you to know that you have received the Spirit of sonship. (Romans 8:15) So call out to Him, “Abba, Father!” and know how much He loves you. Because you are His heir, all that He has is yours to enjoy today!

(taken from The One Thing-Daily Devotional by Pastor Joseph Prince)

Ruth 3:18

Then Naomi said, "Wait, my daughter, until you find out what happens. For the man will not rest until the matter is settled today."

Dear Mister God,

Thank you for giving us the bible. I was reading the Story Of Ruth today just because it shared the same name as my flat mate. I was curious. And I'm glad that my curiosity has taught me something precious today.

My flatmate Ruth and I are the same age and both waiting to meet the right man to marry. Sometimes we fret over things like "why don't some one just set me up on a date", "will he be too short, too old, too ugly" etc.

The bible Ruth may understand our predicament for she too had a rough time in her life when her husband died and Naomi, her mother-in-law, told her to return to her own mom and try to re-marry for there may be no future for Ruth if she chose to stay behind with the aging Naomi. But Ruth, loyal and faithful, chose to stay with Naomi.

Both Naomi and Ruth trudged along and worked in the fields, with little expectations other than making ends meet. But as God planned it, Ruth ended up working for a close relative of Naomi's called Boaz. Boaz was a religious and righteous man who got to know about Naomi and Ruth's misfortune. He took it upon his duty to marry Ruth so that they may continue their family line. Ruth and Boaz would eventually become the grand-parents of David - ancestor of Jesus.

The story of Ruth doesn't sound terribly romantic but it is a story of hope and patience. Hence I pray in Jesus name, that Mister God, you will remove all self-serving desires from the hearts of all the singles in the world. Soothe our nerves, let us know in our "knower" and believe in our "believer" that YOU ARE GOOD and YOU cause everything to work together for the good of those who love You and are called according to Your purpose for them.

Thank you, Mister God.

Lots and lots of love,

P
xoxo

We Are The Reason

Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone)

Chris Tomlin - Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) lyrics

Amazing grace
How sweet the sound
That saved a wretch like me
I once was lost, but now I'm found
Was blind, but now I see
'Twas grace that taught my heart to fear
And grace my fears relieved
How precious did that grace appear
The hour I first believed

Chorus:
My chains are gone
I've been set free
My God, my Savior has ransomed me
And like a flood His mercy reigns
Unending love, Amazing grace

The Lord has promised good to me
His word my hope secures
He will my shield and portion be
As long as life endures

The earth shall soon dissolve like snow
The sun forbear to shine
But God, Who called me here below
Will be forever mine
Will be forever mine
You are forever mine



Song lyrics | Amazing Grace (My Chains Are Gone) lyrics

Psalm 28:7

"The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song." Psalm 28:7

Matthew 14:31

Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. "You of little faith," he said, "why did you doubt?"

Dearest Jesus,

Thank you for Ruth and my IheartChina christian friends for being there for me through these troubled times. After church last Sunday, I made Ruth cry. She said that she really wants me to know you better and receive the joy that you bring.

Prior to that moment, I went to church for the service, as usual. I did feel very strongly about the message that day; it was about FAITH.

Three areas where God may be ignored:
1. In my mind.
Unlike you and how you managed to get with God with your faith, doubts cripple me and takes God out of my mind.

2. In my life.
I am a practical atheist. I believe in some things but not all things. I love my possessions and I believe that the more I have, the happier I will become. I believe that there is a God but I do not believe that He is interested in all aspects of my life i.e. how I earn money, who I have sex with.

3. In my heart.
I may believe in God but I do not want Him to be in charge of my life. All it takes is one tiny bit of rebellion and it corrupts my heart.

With all these odds against God, how can I overcome them and have faith and stop doubting?

Back to the flat. Ruth enjoyed the service very much too. Her faith in you is strong. She wanted to know how I felt. I said nonchalantly, "Oh yea...message was for me." and went on browsing the internet. Bless Ruth for being intuitive and caring. She truly believes in God and though I have been saying that I am "ok", she says "Why just be ok when you can have more?" She says I have to make a decision about you and ask myself if I want to surrender my life to you.

Maybe it is time to surrender. Please Jesus, take me and do whatever you want with me.

Love,
P
xxxxx

John 5:6

When Jesus saw him lying there and learned that he had been in this condition for a long time, he asked him, Do you want to get well?

Hi Jesus!

Thanks for the wonderful speech today.

Why did you ask the invalid at the pool in Bathesda, if he wanted to get well? Surely anyone who has been invalid for 38 years would want to get well, right? On second thought, maybe it is easier to remain an invalid. Afterall, anyone who has lived with a disability for over 38 years, must already be used to its conditions. Perhaps, they aren't sure about having to get back into society after being disabled for so long. Would it actually mean they'll have to find a job once they get well? Such a daunting prospect, if you ask me.

For someone who hasn't yet given my life to God completely, I feel my situation very much similiar to that of the Bathesda invalid. I feel desperate, devoid of joy and just waiting in darkness for someone to help me into the miracle pool to be healed. But you know me (and you know my lack of faith), the same way you knew that invalid. The only difference is, the invalid really wanted to be healed.

But, the question remains, "do I want to be healed/ saved"?
1) No. I'm used to my wretched life.
2) No. I'm afraid of the unknown and my new responsibilities once I am healed/ saved.
or
3) Yes!! I want new strength and completion. I want to get up and walk tall. I want to be set free!

I know what the answer should be but up till now I still hesitate to say it. Please talk to me, Jesus. The same way you spoke to the invalid. Please see me as an individual and not as a crowd. And please bring change in my life. Let today be the day I stop waiting and just get up to walk. I pray for healing and salvation. Jesus, I don't want to wait anymore.

Have a wonderful week ahead.

Lots of love
P
xoxo

Jesus Hearts RaggedyAnn

Ah Yi! Congratulations on your baptism today and may you lead a blessed Christian life that is filled with God's gifts and callings. May you spread the word to eager ears and be a constant source of inspiration to everyone around you. Keep it real, Ah Yi! You rock my world!

Love and peace!
Ah Pat
xoxoxo

Exodus 1:9

"Look," he said to his people, "the Israelites have become much too numerous for us."

Dearest Jesus,

I'm trying to understand the difference between fear of God and the fear of man. Quite often, I realise from experience, the latter leads to sin because when I put myself in charge, I'll mess up and end up committing sin.

Abraham was a great man who devoted his life to doing God's works. But even a great man, such as Abraham, fell into sin once he took matters in his own hands instead of asking God for a direction.

But why is it so hard to trust God to deliver us from our trials and tribulations? Shouldn't there be a probability that out of all the challenges I'll experience in my lifetime, a handful of events could/ would be ignored by God? For instance, I do not feel God's presence as much as I did five months ago, now that my future is full of uncertainty. I do not understand if God has gone off to help others or if I have simply moved on without Him.

You said, "I and the Father am One" and all your life you were obedient to one voice. Although you were tempted in every way but you never gave in, and you were most certainly not fearful of man. Even though there were times, you didn't quite understand God's way, you continued to trust in Him. You had to endure a moment of suffering but through it brought forth victory and resurrection that saved our lives. That was God's promise and to that end, God never let us down.

So if I believe in God, He will rescue me and take me out of my mess. I guess that means I never need to be overwhelmed by my circumstances because in pain and suffering, there will always be a way to triumph.

I want to trust the Lord, I want to know that I am in good hands and most of all, I want to recognise your love for me.

Have a wonderful weekend and see you in church tomorrow.

Lots of love,
P
xx

weiwei!!!

just to say this blog is ALIVE!

Philippians 3:19-21

Their destiny is destruction, their god is their stomach, and their glory is in their shame. Their mind is on earthly things. But our citizenship is in heaven. And we eagerly await a Savior from there, the Lord Jesus Christ, who, by the power that enables him to bring everything under his control, will transform our lowly bodies so that they will be like his glorious body.

Dearest Jesus,

How are you? Haven't heard from you in a while, hope you have been well.

I've been thinking a lot about you, lately. I remember how whenever you were faced with challenges, you always somewhat manage to not only take up the challenge, but go the extra mile to turn it into something extraordinary. I tried to have the same attitude as you did in my own day-to-day, and believe that God will provide for me as long as I have a personal relationship with Him. But most of the time, my eyes desire possessions and I end up becoming a slave to earthly things like money, instead. I may understand that appearances can be deceptive and what looks like real gold may just be a couple of worthless chocolate coins. Yet, I find myself chasing these gold coins anyway. How I wish I had your faith, your wisdom and your attitude towards managing my own finances. At least you won't waste your time chasing after what might turn out to be just chocolate coins when God Almighty is able to give you real solid gold.

Not to mention, I have been putting pleasures before God and I still do not see myself as being any different from a non-believer, the way I crave for material possessions and status. Here's the situation: I know for a fact that you made it possible for me to get up close and personal with God and by the power of God's grace, I am saved and all wealth and goodness shall be provided for me, according to God's plan. By theory, I know I need not worry. But, in practice, I cower in fear of not having enough money or losing that job opportunity much more than believing that God will sort me out and make sure that everything I need will be provided for.

Although I have been showing up in church, I can't help wondering if I come with the right attitude, or am I merely jumping on the bandwagon for hope that perhaps my life will improve if I showed face in church week after week.

So here's my solution. Instead of living my life in strife and envy, I have decided to leave it in your hands. Tell me, Jesus, what do You want? Where do You want me to be? I want to succeed in whatever you want me to do. I will go the extra mile and do more than I'm required to do, when ever I am faced with challenges, because You will provide everything I need.

Jesus, I love you very much and look forward to hearing from you. Let's meet up soon! Keep well.

Lots and lots of love,
P

Hebrews 3:7-8

"So, as the Holy Spirit says: "Today, if you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts as you did in the rebellion, during the time of testing in the desert"

Dear Mister God, will you give me a call?
I feel I need a personal call from you.
Dear Mister God, what is my mission
and what are your plans for me?
I feel like I have been so wrapped up in other things
making ends meet,
getting out of bed in the mornings
I do not hear your mighty voice no more.
Dear Mister God, if I hear your voice,
will my heart still be hard
or will it take me out of darkness
and make me respond to you immediately?
Dear Mister God, I want to know you
and I need your call.
I want to be your sheep.
All you have to do it speak to me
and I will do it.
I belief that if you call me,
it will work, no matter what.
I want a call to embrace your plan.
"As the Father sent me, so I send you"
to bless the world.
I want a call to leave behind my lifestyle
and become a worshipper who sacrifices
my time, my money, my habits
all worldly things.
I want to love because
He first loved me.
Dear Mister God, please, call me.

Amen. xx

Genesis 27:28

May God give you of heaven's dew and of earth's richness— an abundance of grain and new wine.

Dear Mister God, first of all, thank you for letting me survive the Edinburgh Fringe Festival. It was a new experience I was glad to have. To say the least. Maybe I am too old for it, maybe I was too uptight, I was simply getting annoyed at every which way. People who left their dirty plates and cups around the office. People who said just the right words to get on my wick. Then I stopped speaking to everyone soon after because even the sight of them upset me. That's right. I'm quite capable of ditching relationships over dirty dishes, I display a natural knack for it.

Some people were pleasant. Mostly those I didn't have to work with. But on the whole, the festival was great. The weather was delightful albeit Scotland's notorious reputation; we managed to have one BBQ! The company made good earnings this year and most performers seemed genuinely happy. And as I'm typing this fervently, alone in the office at 11:30pm, there are people out at some crowded place crying their hearts out because it's all over and they cannot bear having to say goodbye and go home.

But there are no tears in my eyes because "you're so cold" says one of the interns. Cold? Oh Mister God! Am I cold? Will You show me where I have gone wrong and help me improve myself or am I destined to be another one of those grumpy old maids who works in the library? Cold.

If I say repeatedly, "I want to be happy", will life get better for me or is that too "self help" and unChristian-like? I'm confused. Please help me get back on track, Mister God. Thank you!

Oh and lastly, I missed you. Lots of love, Patty. xx

Luke 4:39

So he bent over her and rebuked the fever, and it left her.

Dear Mister God, please make my fever, cough and cold go away so that I may be well again to work. And thank you for the kindness of my colleagues who have brought food to me and sent me well wishes. Please bless them and keep them safe from harm. I pray in Jesus' name, Amen. xx

John 6:27

Do not work for food that spoils, but for food that endures to eternal life, which the Son of Man will give you. On him God the Father has placed his seal of approval.

Dear Mister God, thank you for my job in London. Thank you for giving me just enough every month. I am better than I deserve. Mister God, tomorrow my company and I are going to Edinburgh for 5 weeks to run venues at the Fringe Festival. Please bless our journey and our stay in Edinburgh and may we all have a smooth-sailing and enriching experience. Please send angels to guide and protect me at all times and grant me a clear mind as I take on this new and exciting challenge. Help me manage my time well and give me good communication skills as I meet new people from all walks of life. Thank you for giving me the courage to speak of you at work and creating awareness of Your presence to my colleagues. As they are now aware of Your kindness and grace, may they get to know You better during this period too. Please also lead me to a church in Edinburgh where I can rest and worship You. Mister God, I want to follow You and I want to have faith. Please hear my prayer, in Jesus' name. Amen. xx

1 Corinthians 6:18-20

Flee from sexual immorality. All other sins a man commits are outside his body, but he who sins sexually sins against his own body. Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

Dear Mister God, please forgive me for my terrible sins. You see, I enjoy telling dirty jokes, having dirty thoughts and discussing sex, pornography and homosexuality openly. I have several gay friends and I'd say stuff like "I'm a gay man trapped in a woman's body." I invented this game called "The Either Or Game" in which I'll ask my friends to choose between 2 people they can imagine having sex with. I also claim to be able to tell if a man is straight or gay just by speaking with him on the phone. The moment a gay man walks out of range, I'll yell out "My gaydar is going off the hook!". I've yet to fail stirring up excitement and laughter amongst my friends and even colleagues with my suggestive jokes and mannerism and I love the attention and response I get. I suppose my lack of respect for sex, made me disregard my own body in the past as I used to think "Oh it's just sex and everyone does it anyway." Well, I don't have sex anymore but I'm not sure if it's because I have learnt to value my body and exercise self-control or because I'm not in a relationship with anyone at the moment. Hmm... What about those sex jokes I make, even to this day? And when my gay friends ask me out to a gay club, do I say "no" or encourage them by accompanying them? I suppose I don't fully understand the seriousness of my willfull and perversed attitude yet but I pray that You will clear my mind from all these dirty thoughts and fill me with the holy spirit instead. I pray for pure and meaningful thoughts. I pray that the next time I have sex, it will be after I get married (and if it is not Your will that I find a husband, may I never fall into the old habit of disregarding my body again). I pray for wisdom to do / say the right thing the next time my gay friends ask me out to a gay club. Mister God, please use my body as an instrument to do Your work instead of wasting it on mindless thoughts and deeds. Last but not least, I pray that I'll always be funny without having to be suggestive or perverted. I sincerely pray, in Jesus' name. Amen. xx

Psalm 43:3

Send forth your light and your truth, let them guide me; let them bring me to your holy mountain, to the place where you dwell.

Dear Mister God, I pray for hunger for the Truth; I pray that I will see signs and know with confidence that Jesus is the way, the truth and the life. I pray for faith that will not shake the foundations of Your word in my life. I pray that I will know with faith that I am doing Your will not just making up my own good ideas. Last but not least, I pray for a human mentor to build me up spiritually into Your glorious kingdom through Your son, Jesus Christ; I pray that this human mentor will burst into my life in the shining glory of Jesus Christ. I pray in Jesus name. Amen. xx

Will I ever stop saying, "I need to see to believe" and start saying, "I need to believe to see"?

James 4:7

Submit yourselves, then, to God. Resist the devil, and he will flee from you.

When I started to believe in God, I also became aware of the devil. Before, I never quite got the hang of demons and evil spirits but now I'm pretty certain they exist as well.

And they are speaking to me... Every day.

One time, they said to me "Don't exaggerate! We only come out to play when you least expect it." And another time they said "Why are these people praying for you? There is nothing wrong with you." I do not read the bible anymore because I much rather go to sleep. The devil is strongest when I am in church. It makes me roll my eyes when people are speaking in tongues and especially when someone says anything along the lines of "God loves every one of us".

I would much rather doodle during Alpha than pay attention. When asked for comments about the truth I'd say "I think Jesus is cool but I don't care to find out if he is really God."

I hate to say this but I kind of revel in the Devil's interest in keeping me as his pet. But my brain is telling me that I need help to drive it away. To this end, I am seeking your thoughts and prayers to help save me. Thank you, my friends!

xx

Psalm 37:3-7

Trust in the LORD and do good; dwell in the land and enjoy safe pasture. Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart. Commit your way to the LORD; trust in him and he will do this: He will make your righteousness shine like the dawn, the justice of your cause like the noonday sun. Be still before the LORD and wait patiently for him; do not fret when men succeed in their ways, when they carry out their wicked schemes.

Dear Mister God, I pray that you will bless Luca's girlfriend, who is very poorly right now. May his love for her be true and everlasting. I also pray that when she wakes from this dream, she'll acknowledge your grace and give you thanks. Also, please help me stay away and not get in his way. Please grant me strength and wisdom, Mister God. Thank you. Amen.

Hebrews 6:4-6

“For it is impossible for those who were once enlightened, and have tasted the heavenly gift, and have become partakers of the Holy Spirit, and have tasted the good word of God and the powers of the age to come, if they fall away, to renew them again to repentance, since they crucify again for themselves the Son of God, and put Him to an open shame.”

Dear Mister God, I used to make fun of you, laugh at Jesus and even challenge you to show yourself to me. I spat at your words and wasn't afraid to blasphemize about it. I led an eventful life making decisions on my own (most of which were wrong) and coping with consequences of my actions. When things went wrong, I blamed you for not keeping the order but when things went smoothly, I never said "thank you". I would tell Christians I believed in you just to silence them from sharing your word with me. I didn't like you very much and I didn't care much about the people who did either. But still you waited for me. And finally I'm here before you, humbled and forgiven. The same words that used to make me scoff are filling my empty heart with meaning and purpose. The holy spirit inspired me with words and these very words changed my heart. The more words I heard, the more revelations I had. Mister God, your works in my life came through your words. You are my Lord and my Christ; I am overwhelmed by Your Majesty. You became the centre of my world.

However, even though I am filled with love for you, there are days I would still ignore you and reject your grace. There are times I wish I could go back to my old self and lead a careless life. There have been thoughts of breaking you down with non-believers' theories. There were moments in church where I would feel like calling it a mad house. When I felt the holy spirit, I have discounted it as a chill from the air-conditioning or embarrassment from being there. But when I am alone, I would think about you and love you all over again as if nothing was wrong. I thought if I didn't speak out, you won't ever have to know the truth.

Until this passage.

After I've read it, one thing became clear: Mister God, you have died for me once and yet everyday, through my own fears and doubts- my disobedience- I (me! not the Jews nor the Romans but ME, the same one you love so dearly) strip you off your dignity and expose you to public humiliation then nail you to the cross and watch you die, over and over again. Why do I do that? I'm no better than a perverse tyrant and a murderer.

Sorry, Mister God. :(

Psalm 143:8

Let the morning bring me word of your unfailing love, for I have put my trust in you. Show me the way I should go, for to you I lift up my soul.

Dear Mister God, for months I have prayed to you to bring M to repentance while I secretly wished he would never get back on his feet again (I'm sorry, I know that was wrong). However, for the past few nights, I have been getting these dreams of M again (how unsettling!). Before long, I found myself playing sleuth and found clues that M might actually be doing well after all. Mister God, I was so overcome with emotions that my body shook violently in fear. Was it an evil spirit or the guilt of lying to you about my feelings towards M? I have not been able to forgive and move on, worst of all, I was harbouring bad thoughts and evil wishing against M all this time whilst you had helped him get up again to face the world. My dearest Mister God, if he has truly repent and was forgiven by you, then you have answered my prayers (albeit my insincerity). I had no right to wish ill of him. Please forgive me, Mister God and please show me the way I should go forth now. I know I can't do this on my own, so please Mister God, please make today the last time I think of M and dream of him again. Mister God, please hear me as I ask this boldly through Jesus Christ. Amen. xx

Hebrews 11:6

And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to him must believe that he exists and that he rewards those who earnestly seek him.

Dear God, I am earnest in seeking the truth but lately I have been seeking to find evidence that Jesus is not truly the son of God. I am still finding it difficult to accept that he is divine and that he had died for my sins. Instead I marvel at his ethical and moral teachings and way of life more than believing that he is my one true God. Please help me God by showing me that Jesus is indeed my Lord God. Thank you. Amen.

Philippians 4:6–7

Romans 6:4

Therefore we are buried with him by baptism into death: that like as Christ was raised up from the dead by the glory of the Father, even so we also should walk in newness of life.

Ma, on the occasion of your Baptism, I'd like to pray that you'll forever rejoice in the light and love of our Lord, Jesus. Amen. xx

Ecclesiastes 3:19-20

For the lot of man and of beast is one lot; the one dies as well as the other. Both have the same life-breath, and man has no advantage over the beast; but all is vanity. Both go to the same place; both were made from the dust, and to the dust they both return.

Dear Mister God, the news today made me feel uneasy. I do not know if it is right or wrong. I don't think these scientists people intend to cause harm. In fact, all they want is to save lives. Isn't life on earth worth fighting for even if the methods seem immoral? On the other hand, is it your plan for us to temper with the life that you have created or should we just leave it you? Mister God, I don't know what to think. Please let these people in the position to make a difference do the right thing today. Amen.

You Are Perfect In God’s Eyes

Hebrews 10:12,14, KJV
12But this man, after he had offered one sacrifice for sins for ever, sat down on the right hand of God… 14For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified.

God sees you with no flaw, spot or imperfection, so honour His Word and the finished work of His Son by saying, “Amen!” Don’t doubt your perfection in Christ.

To see yourself as far from being perfect is not modesty, but a failure to understand the perfect sacrifice that Jesus has made for you.

The Bible tells us, “For by one offering he hath perfected for ever them that are sanctified”. Did you get that? You have not only been sanctified, that is, made holy, but by the same offering of His body, you have been perfected. You are both holy and perfect in the eyes of God!

Your sins have been purged perfectly. Today, Jesus is seated at His Father’s right hand not because He is the Son of God (although that is true), but because His work of purging your sins is completely finished and perfect! So instead of being conscious of your sins, which is to have an evil conscience (Hebrews 10:22), you can have a perfect conscience, a conscience that is free from the guilt and condemnation of sins.

When you find yourself conscious of your sins, just say, “Thank you, Lord Jesus, for Your wonderful work at the cross. It is a perfect work that has removed all my sins completely. Holy Spirit, thank you for convicting me of righteousness, not my own, but God’s righteousness given to me as a gift. Keep on convicting me in the days to come, reminding me especially when I fail that I am still the righteousness of God in Christ.”

My friend, God sees you perfect without any spot of sin. He sees you covered in the beautiful white robes of His own righteousness. He treats you like a righteous man because that is what He has made you. So expect good things to happen to you because blessings are on the head of the righteous! (Proverbs 10:6)

Philippians 4:13

Mere Christianity by C.S. Lewis

This is a book written by the same author of the Narnia chronicles. Here are a couple of excerpts that really struck a cord because we are all relatively new christians who used to be either ignorant or hard-hearted so if you ever find it in a bookstore, I hope you'll pick it up like I did. ;-P

"Now Faith...is the art of holding on to things your reason 'has once accepted, in spite of your changing moods. For moods will change, whatever view your reason takes. I know that by experience. Now that I am a Christian I do have moods in which the whole thing looks very improbable: but when I was an atheist I had moods in which Christianity looked terribly probable. This rebellion of your moods against your real self is going to come anyway. That is why Faith is such a necessary virtue: unless you teach your moods where they get off, you can never be either a sound Christian or even a sound atheist, but just a creature dithering to and fro, with its beliefs really dependent on the weather and the state of its digestion. Consequently one must train the habit of Faith."

"My argument against God was that the universe seemed so cruel and unjust. But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust? If the whole show was bad and senseless from A to Z, so to speak, why did I, who was supposed to be part of the show, find myself in such violent reaction against it? A man feels wet when he falls into water, because man is not a water animal: a fish would not feel wet. Of course, I could have given up my idea of justice by saying that it was nothing but a private idea of my own. But if I did that, then my argument against God collapsed too--for the argument depended on saying that the world was really unjust, not simply that it did not happen to please my private fancies. Thus in the very act of trying to prove that God did not exist--in other words, that the whole of reality was senseless--I found I was forced to assume that one part of reality--namely my idea of justice--was full of sense. Consequently atheism turns out to be too simple. If the whole universe has no meaning, we should never have found out that it has no meaning: just as, if there were no light in the universe and therefore no creatures with eyes, we should never know it was dark. Dark would be without meaning."

1 Corinthians 10:13

No temptation has seized you except what is common to man. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can stand up under it.

Dear Mister God, thank you for giving us wisdom for being aware of the temptations around us. Mister God, is temptation like the cold that is constantly present and doesn't have a cure? Also, what is repression and suppression and why do people seem to get really sick when they consciously make temptations go away themselves? Mister God, if temptation is as common as the cold, please dispense your heavenly medicine to relief us from its symptoms and do not let us waste our minds trying to suppress or repress all these bad stuff. Afterall, it was you who removed my smoking habit overnight, no? Mister God, please let us be cool Christians who don't have to sweat the small stuff like temptations so that we can live fulfilling lives according to your plans. Amen. xx

i had a revelation

hi pat khim reina el and kiah

my first blog entry! sorry last time never really put in much effort.
i will be getting baptised on 25th may at east coast beach. you are all cordially invited. (got food and bbq.)
i didnt really have any strong urge to get baptised but this time round i felt that god has done so much in my life and this is the least i could do. and my cell ladies kept asking me so partly i just wanted to get on with it so that i wouldnt have to come up with any excuse anymore. so it was more like a ok just do it lor...kind of decision.
but little did i know that this small step of very small faith changed something big inside me.
i went for the baptism class on sat and was falling asleep la coz the topics were q dry until suddenly during the second half that everything seemed to make so much sense. i think it was only then did i fully understand wat jesus was about. it felt like it made perfect sense. how the tabernacle was built in the past (the steps the olden day people had to take to go in and how it is reflected in the way we do praise and worship today and the curtain that separated us and god was torn in 2 when jesus died)
then suddenly i just felt a revelation> something changed inside me. a kind of joy and realisation that all the things that were important to me were so trivial in comparison to god's plan for us.
i suddenly bumped into alot of old friends who either spiritually refreshed me or people i had not seen for years and i wanted to share the joy of being god's children w them.
and on sunday our pastor was talking about how we need to remain in jesus. he mentioned something about how it is actually considered immature (in terms of spirituality) to keep worrying about things after we have prayed and trusted god to take care of them. he didnt touch alot on this point but it really stuck in my mind. i was always worried even after i prayed. not knowing that by doing that it simply meant i didnt trust completely that He could help me do EVERYTHING.
alot of other things were 'revelationalised ' - of achievements in my life. i used to think that one's achievements (even how much salary u earn at ur age) were measures of how much u have achieved. but as i read the bible yesterday it dawned upon me that it really dosent matter at all how much money we have or how hard we strive to do things to achieve a sort of recognition for ourselves. it all aint gonna matter if we truly believe in eternity. if we focus on the bigger picture of wat path god has planned for us, other things are secondary and thus we can actually do those things better bcoz we dont hold on them so tightly anymore.
and alot of other things that suddenly click in my mind...too many to list

anyway wat im saying is that god will bless us beyond wat we can imagine when we obey him. ( in my case even when i did not do it full heartedly in the beginning)
hope this revelation will be a blessing to ur day today, we all belong to this big god who can give us a peace that transcends all human understanding and is just waiting to pour abundant blessings on u.

j

Luke 18:9-14

To some who were confident of their own righteousness and looked down on everybody else, Jesus told this parable: "Two men went up to the temple to pray, one a Pharisee and the other a tax collector. The Pharisee stood up and prayed about himself: 'God, I thank you that I am not like other men—robbers, evildoers, adulterers—or even like this tax collector. I fast twice a week and give a tenth of all I get.' "But the tax collector stood at a distance. He would not even look up to heaven, but beat his breast and said, 'God, have mercy on me, a sinner.' "I tell you that this man, rather than the other, went home justified before God. For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted."

Dear Mister God, last week I asked if you loved everybody, even my friend who doesn't know you the way I do. Last night, my friend told me that you had just given him strength and courage to do something new and exciting and he said that it couldn't be anyone or anything else other than you who had blessed him with these gifts. Mister God, you are real to me and there is truly only one of you in the whole wide world. Please continue to guide my friend and may he have confidence to give you thanks the way he knows how. Thank you. Amen.

1 Corinthians 15:42-44

So will it be with the resurrection of the dead. The body that is sown is perishable, it is raised imperishable; it is sown in dishonor, it is raised in glory; it is sown in weakness, it is raised in power; it is sown a natural body, it is raised a spiritual body. If there is a natural body, there is also a spiritual body.

Dear Mister God, please take Trishabelle with you to heaven today to be with Felix and may they play catch, have all the raisins and crab sticks in heaven and be happy for eternity. Please tell them both to wait for Patty to come home and I miss them both so terribly much. Mister God, I am sorry I feel so sad right now and wish I could go back in time to make it right. And I am sorry for having anger against anyone who is going to tell me that Trish and Felix have no souls hence there is no need to weep nor pray for them. Please I beg you, Mister God, please help Trish ascend to heaven to be with Felix today and forever. Amen.

Choose The Good Part And Profit

Isaiah 48:17
17 Thus says the Lord, your Redeemer, the Holy One of Israel: “I am the Lord your God, who teaches you to profit, who leads you by the way you should go.”

God instructs us for our own benefit. He wants us to profit in every area of our lives — our health, finances, social life, marriages and family relationships. The Bible says that it is God who teaches us to profit. And it is God who leads us in the way we should go. He always has our best interests at heart. We only have to sit at His feet, listen to His word and just have fresh, daily communion with Him, and He will make our way prosperous.

We are constantly bombarded with things to do every day, like sending the kids to school, attending a business meeting or making a sales presentation. Likewise, in church, there are just as many important things to attend to — ministering to the needy, reaching out to the lost and healing the sick. But you know what? All these things will be taken care of when we sit at Jesus’ feet and listen to His Word.

What was the Lord’s response to Martha’s complaint that her sister was sitting at His feet and listening to Him, instead of helping her with her many tasks? “Martha, Martha, you are worried and troubled about many things. But one thing is needed, and Mary has chosen that good part, which will not be taken away from her.” (Luke 10:41–42)

Yet, many of us are like Martha. We worry about many things. We are so busy that we have no time to sit at Jesus’ feet to listen to His Word and enjoy communing with Him. When we fail to draw from Him, we end up running on our own strength, and relying on our own flesh and wisdom to get things done. Listen, you can never have a plan that is better than God’s!

My friend, let’s choose the good part like Mary did. Let’s follow God’s way today. Spend time with Jesus, open your Bible and say, “Lord, speak to me.” You will find that your heavenly Father takes care of your troubles, and teaches and leads you to profit!

(taken from http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/dailydevotion/dailydevo.asp)

Matthew 6:28-33

And why are you anxious about clothing? Consider the lilies of the field, how they grow: they neither toil nor spin, yet I tell you, even Solomon in all his glory was not arrayed like one of these. But if God so clothes the grass of the field, which today is alive and tomorrow is thrown into the oven, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? Therefore do not be anxious, saying, ‘What shall we eat?’ or ‘What shall we drink?’ or ‘What shall we wear?’ For the Gentiles seek after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them all. But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.

Dear Mister God, thank you for providing me with everything that I could ever want and giving me the confidence that no matter how little money I may have in the bank right now and how uncertain my future may seem, Mister God, I know you will provide for me. Oh and Mister God, was it you who arranged for me to see that flat at Mile End today? I love it, Mister God! And the girl who lives there, she is a nice Christian girl who is going to invite me to your Church...I think it's called New Frontiers, if I decide to move in with her. Mister God! You are amazing! I l..l..l..l..l..love you, Mister God! xx Amen.

God’s Superabounding Grace For Us

2 Corinthians 9:8
8And God is able to make all grace abound towards you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.

If you were in the same synagogue as the man with the withered hand (Luke 6:6–11), how would you see him and what would you say to him?

Jesus was preaching in that synagogue when He saw the man with the withered hand. But He also saw superabounding grace around that hand for healing and wholeness. He sees differently from us. He sees the invisible. He sees that the kingdom of God is here, ever present in any situation, with superabundant supplies. We see only the visible, which is tangible, which is temporal and which seems so real to us.

But Jesus saw superabounding grace on that withered hand for healing because you do not tell a man with a withered hand, “Stretch out your hand,” unless you see the supply, the superabundance for wholeness for that hand. Jesus called forth the superabounding grace to envelop that man’s withered hand, and the hand was made whole.

It is possible for someone who is sick to have superabounding grace on him and yet that superabundance of grace does not heal his body. That is because he keeps on acknowledging what the devil is doing. He keeps being more concerned about that which is visible and temporal.

Instead of calling forth, and acknowledging and confessing the superabundance of grace, he confesses what the devil is doing to him all the time. So even though the superabounding grace is there, it is there in vain. Isn’t that sad?

Jesus called forth life. And life came into visibility. We must call it forth. Say, “Father, I thank You right now, though my health is under attack, I know that there is superabounding grace for healing and health. I receive it now. I call it forth now in Jesus’ name, Amen!”

My friend, don’t be conscious of what you see missing or lacking. Be conscious of God’s superabounding grace for you and avail yourself to it!

(taken from http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/dailydevotion/dailydevo.asp)

Ezekiel 34:1-6

The word of the LORD came to me: 2 "Son of man, prophesy against the shepherds of Israel; prophesy and say to them: 'This is what the Sovereign LORD says: Woe to the shepherds of Israel who only take care of themselves! Should not shepherds take care of the flock? 3 You eat the curds, clothe yourselves with the wool and slaughter the choice animals, but you do not take care of the flock. 4 You have not strengthened the weak or healed the sick or bound up the injured. You have not brought back the strays or searched for the lost. You have ruled them harshly and brutally. 5 So they were scattered because there was no shepherd, and when they were scattered they became food for all the wild animals. 6 My sheep wandered over all the mountains and on every high hill. They were scattered over the whole earth, and no one searched or looked for them. (NIV)

Dear Mister God, I pray that I do not become selfish and forget to care for the ones around me. But Mister God, I also pray that people won't refuse my help either and think that I have gone insane. Why are there people who admit that they are troubled and need help but choose to seek strength from human pyschologists and psychiatrists when they can come to you for healing? Mister God, please help me understand so that I do not judge anyone who needs your help. Thank you, Mister God. Amen.

2 Corinthians 4:16-17

Therefore we do not lose heart though outwardly we are wasting away, yet inwardly we are being renewed day by day. For our light and momentary troubles are achieving for us an eternal glory that far outweighs them all. (NIV)

Dear Mister God, I have a friend and he is Muslim. Do you love him too, Mister God? I think my friend is sad about something that happened in the past and he always has these sad eyes. Will you help him, Mister God, even if he doesn't know you the way I do? Mister God, please don't let my friend waste away. Thank you, Mister God. Amen.

Proverbs 3:5-6

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.(NIV)

Dear Mister God, someone said the other day that religion is having blind faith because no one knows for sure you exist. Please don't make me blind, Mister God, for I want to see the truth. I want to see the whole world that you have created, all the good and the bad and to have the wisdom to know that my faith, though is strong and pure, is also one with facts and truth. Thank you, Mister God. Amen.

Ephesians 2:4

But God, being rich in mercy, because of his great love with which he loved us, even though we were dead in transgressions, made us alive together with Christ – by grace you are saved!

Dear Mister God, today Patty cried. But by the power of your grace, Patty now realise that you are not just only a Mister God who can forgive all of Patty's sins, but you are also her friend who will always walk with her, hand in hand, no matter what. Thank you Mister God. I love you. Amen.

Luke 23:34

Then said Jesus, "Father, forgive them; for they know not what they do"

Dear Mister God, today Patty had sinned and she know not what she'd done. She had thoughts of vengence and anger. She wanted to condemn a man (on your behalf) for his sins against her because she wanted justice to be served before her. She could not forgive cheerfully like you said in the bible and she shut you off from her mind the whole time, refusing to listen to what you had to say. But when it was time to face that man, she called upon you to come with her and give her strength. In the end, she did not inflict any pain or destroy anything. She boldly faced the man and demanded for what was hers and left. But Patty left with a heavy heart as if she should have hurt the man at least a wee bit before leaving. Like scratching his new car or throwing his shoe rack down the stairs. Patty was full of anger and sadness. She knows not what she'd done. Then Patty saw this verse and she thought to herself, "But that man who hurt her, he too knows not what he had done."

Thank you, Mister God for not letting Patty carry out her unpure thoughts today. And please Mister God, please help Patty forgive cheerfully and let her carry on in peace. Amen.

God Is Our Strength

Ephesians 6:10
10Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord and in the power of His might.

When you say, “I can manage this problem by myself, Lord,” God says, “Okay, you do it then.” But when you say, “Help me, Lord! I need You. I cannot do this on my own,” God says, “Good, I have been waiting for you to say that. You cannot, but I can. Now, watch Me!” That is how God is — He loves it when you depend on Him.

You see, when you think that you are strong and don’t need God, He cannot help you. But when you need Him and look to Him, He will not leave you weak and helpless. He comes and becomes the strength of your life. He becomes the breakthrough that you need.

A church member with a smoking habit came to me one day and said, “Pastor Prince, please pray that God will help me. I want to stop my smoking habit.”

I simply told him, “You cannot, but God can.”

He replied, “Yes, I know that I can’t. But with God’s help, I will discipline myself and try my best to quit the habit.”

I told him, “No, you cannot, but God can.” I repeated this to him a few times until he realised that it was not his self-discipline or willpower that would help him overcome his smoking habit, but the power of God. He finally understood that true deliverance from this destructive habit would not come by his own strength, but by “[being] strong in the Lord and in the power of His might”.

When I saw him again a few weeks later, he said, “Pastor Prince, since that day, I didn’t even try to stop myself from smoking. But each time I lit up, I told God, ‘I cannot, but You can.’ Then one day, the craving was gone! Jesus has completely delivered me from my bondage to nicotine!” This man experienced true deliverance, not just an outward form of discipline and willpower.

So when you say, “I can do something about it,” you are still relying on your human strength. But when you say to God, “I cannot, but You can,” you have just tapped into the real source of your strength — Jesus. And as you rest in His strength, you will see His power manifesting in your life.

(taken from http://www.newcreation.org.sg/resources/dailydevotion/dailydevo.asp)

Romans 8:27

The Holy Spirit will know exactly what is going on, who is in danger and how to pray for deliverance.

God = Father + Son + Holy Spirit (Holy Trinity)
Every day we pray to our heavenly Father through Jesus Christ in English but when we let the Holy Spirit come into our lives, we are suppose to be able to speak in tongues. When we pray in tongues, we may not understand the message at once. We simply trust His goodness and pray in tongues for everything that He has planned for us to come to pass in His perfect time. And if we do it purely and freely as possible, we could be praying for the safety of a loved one in a life and death situation. And when the time comes, we will realise it was the Holy Spirit delivering us from evil and danger.

I do not pray in tongues and never thought much about this until now. In fact, I feel that it is weird and scarey when I recall watching pagan worshipping (we call them Dang Kee) and how men get possessed by "holy spirits" to send us messages or blessings from another realm. I know it is real but I simply cannot fathom the idea of letting spirits come into my body. Likewise, I do not like the feeling whenever I get an attack of sleep paralysis. It feels like my body is taken over by spirits as I hallucinate spirits moving in and around my paralysized body. I love reading other people's testimony about their gift of praying in tongues but unfortunately my own experiences create a barrier between me and the Holy Spirit from the Holy Trinity. I pray that God will remove my fear and let me see it as a blessing instead of something weird and scarey. - Patricia

John 3:16

For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life. (NIV)

Before taking the forbidden fruit, Adam and Eve (humans) were one with God.
After taking the forbidden fruit, Adam and Eve (humans) were separated from God.
Through the years, only the high priests e.g. Moses could speak with God by sacrificing a lamb because blood represented life.
Then God sent Jesus Christ (lamb of God) to be the human sacrifice for mankind's sins which allowed us to be one with God once again, through Jesus Christ.
That's why today we are free to have a personal relationship with God through prayer without fear.

Be Still My Soul- Words and Music by Kim Noblitt

Be still my soul
Be still my soul
Cease from the labor and the toil
Refreshing springs of peace wait
To troubled minds and hearts that ache

Be still my soul
God knows your way
And He will guide
For His name's sake
Plunge in the rivers of His grace
Rest in the arms of His embrace

Be still my soul
Be still my soul
Though battles round you rage and roar
One thing you need and nothing more
To hear the whisper of your Lord

Be still my child
I know your way
And I will guide
For my name's sake
Plunge in the rivers of My grace
Rest in the arms of My embrace

God Loves you

Be Still

Welcome

My name is Patricia and I'm a free-thinker. These days I have been thinking a lot about Jesus and I want to know Him better. My friends, Joanne, Khim and Reina and the driving forces behind my search for the truth and through them, I am learning about Jesus and how his life, death and resurrection is important to me. Together, my friends and I will share stories of our own revelations that is changing our lives and the way we live forever.